Monday 1 February 2016

Pinch, Punch First Day Of The Month!

Where has the month gone? Where?!?!?! Can you believe that January 2016 is actually over? Because I'm struggling to come to terms with it if I'm completely honest. Is time going faster or am I just getting older and therefore more aware of it? I don't know but I'm not sure I like it. But for now I'll grin and bear it and say a hearty "welcome" to February and all that it will bring.

Life is short. We know that. That phrase is thrown about all the time, sometimes as an excuse for recklessness, sometimes as an actual fact and sometimes just to fill awkward silences. Okay so granted, saying "life is short" in an awkward silence is probably gonna make things more awkward. In fact it will. Don't say it. I've done it before and the person backed away slowly thinking I was about to kill him.

But anyway, life is short. There's no two ways about it. You have your allotted time on this earth and once it's up, it's up. Some of us have longer than others but the reason we throw the phrase about so much is because the more we go on, the more we realise this. Loved ones leave us way before their time more and more and it's a terrifying fact of life. I've lost many people close to me and it never seems to get easier to deal with, but why should it? Death is a harsh reality that we have to deal with.

I don't care how cliche this sounds but tell the people you love that you love them. Tell people how much they mean to you. Write that book that you always wanted to write. Showcase those drawings you always wanted to get out there. Upload that singing video to YouTube. Shoot your shot. Post that vlog with those anecdotes you were nervous about. Reach those goals. Be who you want to be and the best version of that. Because our time is limited. Why not use that time to be as happy as we can be?

That's all easier said than done of course, but sometimes we're so stuck with thoughts of "I can't" that we fail to make ways to make things work. That's all. Just a little reminder that you deserve to be happy too, not just those around you.

Keep smiling folks, as hard as that may be at times.

Ditzy xXx

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Sunday 31 January 2016

I'm Back! Hello From The Other Side (. . . and other cringe-worthy song violating titles you can think of. . . )

Ugh how long has it been since I last spoke to you guys?! I'll tell you how long. . . 17 months! And I know that sounds like an overbearing mother saying her child is 24 months instead of simply 2 years old but I needed to emphasise the enormity of the matter. 17 months of no pointless ramblings from a slightly demented, verbally gesticular heap of a person. "Verbally gesticular" isn't really a term by the way but it seems fitting for how I feel. In fact, "gesticular" isn't a word but it doesn't matter because it's satisfying to say. Say it. . . "gesticular". Glorious, right?

So, if you've followed my trail of pandemonium, you'll know that I started doing vlogs on YouTube. It was just another platform I wanted to try out since I love talking so much and to be honest, my friends seemed to enjoy them as much as I liked making them so that was pretty rewarding in itself.

Then I got ill.


********** SHOCK **********
********** HORROR *********
********** DISASTER **********

***boo hoo/sob sob/waterworks/sighs of pity/too bad/oh what shame/life goes on***

Now I'm on the road to recovery. So I thought I'd say hi, inform you that I'm not dead and let you know that I plan to be here to stay. I miss writing my scattered thoughts down and I miss hearing your reactions to my posts. So I've decided to start blogging again, with maybe the occasional vlog thrown about here and there for good measure.

A lot has happened over the past year or so but I feel like it'd be redundant to talk about it all. Though it has to be said, despite everything, my love of food is still heartily intact. So I'm almost back to my old self with a bit more wisdom and a smidgen more body fat but ya know what? That's okay. Because I'm in a pretty bright place right now. And nope, it's not because I have a 100 watt light bulb in my lamp (don't ask).

So basically this is my big:
"Hello, it's me, 
I was wondering if after all these months you'd like to read, 
To go over everything. 
They say that times supposed to heal ya, 
And I've done quite a lot of healing actually. 
Hello, can you see this? 
I'm sat behind this screen in England with a cup of tea. 
And it's raining. . . and cold, 
I've forgotten how it felt to be able to feel my feet.
There's such a difference, between my posts
And a million thoughts.

Hello from the other side
I must've wrote a thousand times
To tell you I'm sorry for not posting so much
But when I sit down to write, my brain turns to mulch
Hello from the outside
At least this post that I've designed
Is something that I'm a little bit proud of.
And I hope that you think it's not -overly soft
For a blog."

Okay I had a lot of fun writing that. It was totally unplanned. I intended to just write "this is my big "hello, it's me, I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to read" but then it escalated like a Bollywood movie/Telenovela explosion (yep, I'm hooked on Jane The Virgin). It's actually so cringey it's giving me butterflies but I can't have a big Adele-like break and not come back in Adele-like manner, can I?

So anyway, let me leave before I absolutely, unapologetically obliterate another song.

Keep smiling, folks!

Ditzy xXx

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